Outdated law promotes domestic violence

Please go to http://www.brown.senate.gov/contact

And choose message topic "request for help"

In the comments box, share your opinion and then paste this.

"I am a 25 year old single mother.

I am a victim of Domestic Violence. My son was in my arms when the domestic violence occurred. Charges were pressed with suspended sentences. See case 09CRB04840-A in City of Hamilton Municipal.

Since then, a restraining order has been put in place. See case DV09091299 in Butler county.

It was violated several times. Charges were pressed with suspended sentences. See Hamilton Police department case report 08732, Ross Township incident report 10-0145, Ross Township incident report 11 057 03, Ross Township incident report 11 060 04, Case 11CRB04178-A in City of Hamilton Municipal. Also, not reported to police, phone calls were received 4/27/2010 10:12am, 12/11/2010 5:32pm, 12/25/2010 11:57am, and 3/17/2011 1:40pm. Facebook messages 1/5/10, 4/29/11, as well as numerous vulgar status updates about his "babby's mom".

In Butler County probate court, case # PI 10-01-0001, You will find a hearing in which the Defendant illegally removed $4850 from my CSEA account. You will also find a judgement for $1000 in legal fees. The $4850 was returned. The $1000, however, was never paid.

The last child support payment I received was March 8, 2010. Which as you read above, was quite a fight to receive.

In addition, there is City Of Hamilton Municipal court cases 12CRB 00158-A (Disorderly conduct, Lowered from Domestic Violence) and 12CRB04178-A (receiving stolen property). Hamilton county case C/11/CRB/28135 (criminal trespassing and theft)

I am trying to have parental rights terminated. I would prefer to have rights terminated voluntarily, as he has agreed to once before. However, I have been informed by my lawyer that I must be married and there must be an adoptive party. If only you can imagine my disappointment. I have raised my son for 4 years with no help from his biological father. I have received child support in the form of one payment, and there are currently over $2500 in arrearages. It is considered old fashioned to frown upon unwed parents. I understand that many people will say "you chose to have a child with him". I did not choose for him to BECOME a drug addict and threaten my, and my son's, safety. He was a different person when I chose to be with him.

Domestic violence is a hard circumstance to escape. Victims usually attempt to leave 4 times before they are even successful. And in my circumstance, the court is FORCING me and my son to spend the next 14 years connected to our abuser. They are telling me that because I am not married, I do not have the same rights to escape my abuser. How can this be?

I understand the courts want to protect his rights as well, but what about my son's rights. He has not seen my son in over 3 years. Here are links to the U.S. Department of Health and Human services and UNICEF in regards to children and domestic violence.
http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/domesticviolence.cfm
http://www.unicef.org/protection/files/BehindClosedDoors.pdf

If it is about the best interest of the child... Why isn't any of this a factor... Why is my marital status the determining factor?

Jamie Stevison
jamie.tene@gmail.com"

The stay-home vs work struggle

As a full time nurse and full time mom… I'm struggling with doing both.

•Day care is expensive, at almost $700 a month for full time.
•I don't feel like my almost 4-year-old is getting the education I'd like. A lot of his crafts come home looking like an adult assembles them.
•Although he's getting to interact with other children, he's also bringing home their bad words, back talking, and poor behavior.
•My daycare was the only option, local daycares are open 6-6. I work 7-730. It has to be somewhere convenient for Joe or my parents to pick up.
•I don't think they take my concerns seriously. (Ie clothes being on right when I drop him off and backwards when I pick him up, kids biting-he was bit 8 times last summer, lack of behavior reports-I wanna be an active parent and aware of his behavior)
•Every class does not have a teacher with a degree.
•Finding a babysitter has proven to be a challenge. All my friends and family work.
•My schedule varies (three 12-hour shifts)… day care is a set schedule. Which means I'm paying for days I don't need. What a waste!!! Right now, I'm paying for 3 days/wk. Some weeks, I don't need to take him at all because of my work schedule.

The reality of losing a sibling; from the big sister. Pt 2

The reality of losing a sibling; from the big sister.

Part Two

Read Part One here

The days after Jeremy died were a blur. I'm going to share what I remember.

April 27, 2012

Upon entering the house, after telling my mom the news, we escorted her to the kitchen table. She missed the chair while trying to sit and the entire table almost toppled over. (Prior to her arrival, we had already discussed the possibility of having to call an ambulance.) My mother had a history of hyperventilating and anxiety. For a brief moment, I thought I'd watch her be carted away.  I don't remember what time the police came to notify us, but he died at 8:32am. The screaming phone call was sometime around 10am. My mom didn't get home until around 11am. The Chaplin arrived before the officer. Everything was backwards. I had taken my mom's cell, the house phone, and my phone. In between checking on my mother and calling family, I was holding my own grief in.

Save that candle jar!

How much money do you spend on beautiful candles in glass jars, just to throw those jars away? And how much money do you spend on containers to store various items in? Well here are some SUPER easy steps to save your jars!

Step one: Enjoy your candle!

How to hollow a light bulb

Here we are, with light bulbs going in the trash left and right... and Christmas coming quickly. I hate hate hate throwing things away! Here are some instructions to re-use that bad boy!

Step one: 

Begin by peeling up a corner of this do-hickey. I used a nail tip. You can use a razor blade, screwdriver, or anything else of that nature.

The reality of losing a sibling; from the big sister. Pt 1

The reality of losing a sibling; from the big sister.

Part One - His wonderful life and tragic end

Read part two here

This series is deeply personal. I want to express the dirty truths; the guilt, grief, anger, and even jealousy. The things no one tells you, no one talks about, and the feelings you may even be ashamed of. It is part of a series... I'm not sure how many parts. In this part, an introduction and the tragic day of his death.

 This...

is Jeremy

He was born June 1, 1980. He is the youngest of 3. He loved dinosaurs as a kid.  He loved to prank people and joke around (as shown by his silly jacket above). He loved camping, boating, fishing, and hunting. He was handsome, funny, and ornery. We grew up with a close family, we fought ALL THE TIME. He was spoiled and a brat (I say this out of love). Growing up, there was a lot of jealousy. He was the baby, spoiled. He got everything he wanted. He wanted new clothes, he was handed my parents credit card.

Mother's day 2009

Did i say we fought all the time? Not just arguing. Fist fights. It wasn't until he was a teenager that we started getting along, but even through all the fights, we defended each other. When it came down to it, we were typical siblings. Jeremy didn't drink(with the exception of obsessive consumption of Mountain Dew), smoke, or do drugs. He wanted to wait until he was 21 to drink, I couldn't even tell you why. He was the designated driver for all of his friends. He would drop anything he was doing to help them. He loved my son. He gave him Mountain Dew in a sippy cup (highly illegal! My son, now almost 4, still isn't allowed to have pop), babysat, and spun him in a office chair for hours. You know, looking back, maybe he wasn't the best choice for a babysitter.

Gossip like its your job… at your job

      If there is anything people unanimously claim to hate(while also being guilty of the act)… it's gossip. I work with mostly women. At any given moment there are 10 staff members on my floor. The maximum amount that could be male… 2. Are the men excluded from this gossip? No! They are equally as guilty. And quite often, it seems, they are the center. The sad part is, that gossip can ruin even the most perfect job. It can make people miserable, adult bullying at its finest. With websites like TMZ and EOnline, The media makes us believe that its okay. It surly is not. We can go on and on about all of the reasons that gossip is wrong, but we all know that it is so lets skip that part. I've included tips from 2 different websites.

Here are some great tips from tinybuddha.com written by Shanti Sosienski -With comments from myself in green.

An introduction...

So, I'm Jamie, co-author to this blog, full time nurse and a full time mom. I wear more hats than I care to count (If the saying were something to do with shoes... I may be tempted to count. HA!).

Carly and I have been friends for eh... 10 years? We have always joked about having a website together... and now it's here!

I'm not really sure where to go with this yet, but i wanted to say "HI!" and introduce myself to the blog world! My life is FULL of interesting topics. From nails and makeup, to the loss of a sibling and motherhood. I'm sure I will be prepared to dive into them soon, But for now I must work on my chores. Today is tidy the house and vacuum day! Exciting, I know.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving and a safe black Friday!